My advice to the younger me!!

20:20, April 4,2022, it’s been only three days since I came from my thesis experiment at Michigan State University. After endlessly working day and night for a month I was dame tired and was sitting on the couch in my living room. I was enjoying some beautiful music on Siri and was scrolling some reels on Instagram. Suddenly, I heard the noise of opening the front door of my apartment. I guessed it was my roommate and I was right. I looked at him and said “Hi”. As always, he was looking tired and was about to explode on me with his day stories with his mates, students, and advisor or ask me something. It seems like he always just waits for me to say hi and then he starts with his stories. I was a bit tired and trying to avoid the long conversation with him today, but I had no idea today he is going to ask me something that was going to hit me hard. He entered the apartment and asked me straightly even without putting his bag down.....

What advice would you give to the younger you? I was just shocked at the first instance and laughed loudly because I didn’t have any immediate answer to this question. I was tired but this question just woke me up.

I answered him in a casual manner and thought more about it later and discussed it with him. Today via this blog I am sharing some of the advice that I would like to give a younger me. I will start from my school life and will move along.

Before we start, I just want to let me guys know that:

                                                                           कागज की कश्ती थीं, समुंद्र का किनारा था ।

                                                                           खेलने की मस्ती थी, दिल ये आवारा था।

                                                                           कहाँ आ गए इस समझदारी की दल दल में,

                                                                           वो नादान बचपन भी कितना प्यारा था ।

1) First advice to me as being a school kid is, beta there are other important things also than study.

          a. Play a sport
    b. Don’t be a silent guy
    c. Talk to friends and people around you
    d. Participate in extracurricular activities
    e. Girls don’t eat boys, they are cute. THE BIG ADVICE!!
    f. Complain less, work more.
    g. Never miss the farewell party, dance hard!!
    h. English is just a subject, not your life.
    i.  Understand others they might have different and better perspectives.

2) Make sure you make some good friends in your school time. Believe me, they are going to be your best friends, supporters, and well-wisher.

3) If you can get your life partner from your school/college time that’s going to be “sone pe suhaga”.

4) Make short-term goals and a final goal in your life. Think about where you want to see yourself in the next 2, 5, or 10 years and start working on it.

5) For school kids, do not run for marks, it just matters to get you admission to a good college based on percentage. (Which is not going to be true anymore. One needs to appear for cucet exam now to get admission in college after your schooling, for details “https://cuet.nta.nic.in/“)

    

     6) Depending on your family background, if your parents are not educated, they might not give you good advice, so think carefully before making a step in your education. (By this I don’t mean to hurt anyone’s feelings, but I just want to tell you that my parents are proud of me today “because” I did not follow their advice in the beginning)

7) Respect your parents, they might be wrong in some situations, but they are your true well-wisher of yours.
8) Your teachers are the best advisors for you.
9) Learn to play at least one sport
10)  Learn to play a musical instrument
11)  If possible, visit different parts of the India or world, this will open your eyes.
12)  Do not hesitate to seek help if you need it, no matter whether it is mentally, financially, etc.
13)  You are your first priority.
14)  If you like someone tells them. “You only got one life make sure you enjoy it but also make sure you don't screw someone's life for your benefits;” Here is a perfect example of how to propose to your physicist girlfriend: read this article it's very interesting. "https://imgur.com/SKNl3VR"

15)  If possible, never sacrifice your dreams for money, I did a little bit. After my schooling, I wanted to go for engineering (Coaching for JEE exam). Some of my teachers were ready to help me but I didn’t choose that because somewhere in the back of my mind I had a fear, 1) if I didn’t clear the JEE exam even after 1 year of coaching what will my teachers think and I will waste one year……but remember you never waste your time when you are studying something, you always learn something. 2)  How will I return their money which they will spend on my fee, this was a very big point because I never had trust on me that I can earn that much money…….Have trust in yourself, if you are on a good path you can do it. “YOU CAN CHANGE THE TIME”. Finally, I made it to IIT for my master's, but it was never the same thing.

16)  Study matters and of course, it’s important but it is not everything.

17)  Learn a different language other than Hindi and English during your school or college time.

18)  Never judge people, we see the people as we are but not as they are. A perfect example is. During my college time, one day, one of my best friends bought an earphone worth 600 rupees from amazon and he was telling me about it. I just exploded at him why did you waste 600 rupees on earphones and showed him my earphone that I just got from the metro station is only 50 rupees. We had a big argument on this topic. I again did the same thing with one of my other friends in my early IIT days. I couldn’t appreciate their point at that time but now I better do and today I have earphones worth 20K. This was just dame funny; I still feel shame for my old behavior sometimes. My advice to you is everyone’s horizon is different, to appreciate others’ opinions.

19)  Learn some skills to enjoy.
20)  Learn some skills that can make you feed when you have nothing.
21)  Make some hobbies and work on them.
22)  Make some time for friends and family.
23)  Support other needy people with your time and money, blessing works!!
24)  Never think you know everything, ask for advice when needed.
25)  During your college life, you must go for a night out with friends.
26)  Go for a trip with friends.
27)  Go for a trip with family.
28)  Be forgiving of yourself and others.
29)  Give people a second chance, but not a third.

      30) Respect your elders.

      31) Mummy, Papa, Dada Dadi, Nana, Nani Ji ke per dabao, I did it a lot.

      32) Avoid scrolling your phone when you are with your parents.

      33) Don't use social media for at least one day a week. 

      

      Some other advice that learned from the book "The Complete Life's little instruction book"

      

       1) Remember other people’s birthdays and celebrate with them.

       2) Live beneath your means

       3) Buy whatever kids are selling on bus/train/metro station
 4) Return all the things you borrow
 5) Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.
 6) Make new friends but cherish the old ones
 7) Keep secrets
 8) Don’t postpone joy
 9) Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen every day.
10) Keep a tight rein on your temper.
11) Surprise loved ones with little unexpected gifts.
12) Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.
13) Be a role example for your children.
14) Admit your mistakes.
15) Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.
16) Choose your life’s mate carefully. 90% of happiness or misery comes from this decision, I understand it’s tough bra!!
17) Be the organizer of class reunions.
18) Smile a lot, even in difficult times.
19) Be a good friend to your children and respect their privacy.
20) Learn to listen.
21) Give yourself at least an hour to cool off before responding to someone who has provoked you.
22) Learn to handle emotions.
23) Avoid negative people.
24) NEVER give up.
25) Never act when you are angry.
26) Be your partner’s best friend and be romantic to her/him.
27) Ask “why” a lot.
28) Don’t worry that you can’t give your kids the best of everything. Give them your very best.
29) Show respect to others.
30) Don’t waste time grieving over past mistakes. Learn from them and move on.
31) Praise in public and criticize in private.
32) Keep your promises.
33) Remember overnight success takes hard work over years.